How to Be a Bulletproof Husband

In today’s society, it is more important than ever for husbands to be “bulletproof.” This means being emotionally and mentally strong, physically present, and available for our families. It can be challenging to juggle work, family, and other commitments, but it is vital that husbands be there for their wives and children. I call this a “bulletproof husband,” but it can also be applied to boyfriends, fathers, brothers, and any other man in a position of influence and responsibility.

When I first married, I worked long hours, and my wife was home with our two young children. I felt guilty about not being there as much as I wanted, but I knew I had to provide for my family. I made a point of being home for dinner every night, even if it meant working late. I also started taking my wife and kids on regular Date Nights. This was a time for us to reconnect and focus on our relationship. 

And since then, I’ve learned a whole lot more. So in the spirit of strong marriages, here are some tips on how to be a bulletproof husband:

What does it take to be a bulletproof husband?

a strong husband lifting a car over his head

Here are the three most important things I’ve learned over 13+ years of marriage:

  1. Be emotionally present. This means being available to listen to your wife and children and emotionally supportive when needed. Being honest with your emotions is also important so your wife and children can rely on you.
  2. Be mentally strong. This means having a positive mindset and being able to handle stress healthily. It is also essential to be able to problem-solve so that you can support your family when they need it most.
  3. Be physically present. This means making time for your family and being available when they need you. Taking care of yourself physically is also essential to be there for your family in the long run.

The basics of being a good husband

Though the term “bulletproof” may be a bit of an exaggeration, becoming a good husband is not as complicated as it may seem. You need to do only three things to ensure your marriage is strong and your wife is happy.

Be supportive

The best husbands are supportive husbands. They are the wind beneath their wives’ wings, always there to lift them up and help them achieve their dreams. If your wife has a goal she’s working towards, do whatever you can to help her achieve it. Whether helping with the kids so she can have some time to herself or being her sounding board when she’s feeling stressed about something, your support will let her know that you’re always in her corner.

Be communicative

The most important thing you can do as a husband is communicate with your wife. Talk to her about your day, hopes and dreams, and anything else on your mind. Tell her you’re always there for her and that she can rely on you for anything she needs. This will go a long way toward making your wife feel loved and secure in your relationship.

Be considerate

Be considerate of your wife’s feelings, needs, and preferences. Just because you wouldn’t want to do something or feel a certain way doesn’t mean your wife feels the same. It’s important to consider her feelings and needs, even if they differ from yours.

Some things you can do to be more considerate include:

  • Listening to her when she talks without interrupting or changing the subject
  • Asking her for her opinion on important decisions
  • Making an effort to do things that are important to her, even if they’re not necessarily important to you
  • Taking her feelings and needs into consideration when making decisions that will affect both of you

Women tend to be more emotional than men, so it’s important to consider your wife’s emotions. If she’s having a bad day, lend a listening ear and try to make her feel better. If she’s happy, share in her happiness and enjoy the moment with her.

Be affectionate

Being affectionate towards your wife is one of the most important things you can do to be a good husband. It lets her know that you still care about her and are interested in her. Try to do things like hug her, kiss her and hold her hand whenever you can. You should also compliment her regularly. Let her know how much you appreciate everything she does for you.

Going above and beyond the basics

A husband is so much more than a husband. He is a best friend, a protector, and a confidante. He is the one person you can always count on, no matter what. He is your rock, your foundation. So how do you become a husband like that? It starts with going above and beyond the basics.

Be her best friend

For your wife to feel truly loved, she needs to know that you are her husband and best friend. Be someone she can confide in, laugh with, and rely on. This doesn’t mean that you have to be joined at the hip – simply being there for her when she needs you will let her know that she can always count on you.

Be her sounding board

Your wife will have a lot on her mind — work, friends, family, the kids — and sometimes she needs to vent. Be a good listener and let her get whatever is bothering her off her chest. Try to be understanding and sympathetic, even if you can’t always relate to what she’s going through. And resist the temptation to advise unless she asks for it. Just being there for her is often enough.

Be her confidante

Your wife will have things she needs to get off her chest that she doesn’t necessarily want to share with her friends. Be the one she comes to when she needs to talk. This doesn’t mean that you need to agree with everything she says necessarily, but be a sounding board for her and allow her to vent without judgment.

Be her partner in crime

Sure, being a good husband means being supportive and helpful, but it also means being your wife’s best friend and partner in crime. Whether planning a weekend getaway or tackling a to-do list around the house, working together as a team will help you both feel supported and appreciated. Plus, it’s just more fun that way!

Do you have what it takes to be a bulletproof husband?

We all want to be the best husbands possible. But sometimes, it’s hard to know how to go about it. Luckily, there are some tried and true methods for becoming a bulletproof husband. By following these simple tips, you can be sure you’re doing everything possible to make your marriage strong and lasting.




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Chad is the co-founder of Unfinished Man, a leading men's lifestyle site. He provides straightforward advice on fashion, tech, and relationships based on his own experiences and product tests. Chad's relaxed flair makes him the site's accessible expert for savvy young professionals seeking trustworthy recommendations on living well.

2 comments on “How to Be a Bulletproof Husband”

  1. I completely agree with the importance of being a “bulletproof” husband. The tips provided in the article are spot on and something that I have personally tried to embody in my own marriage. One thing that I would like to add is the importance of compromise and flexibility. Being able to compromise and be flexible in your marriage is crucial in order to make sure that both you and your partner are happy and satisfied. A personal example of this for me was when my wife wanted to move to a different state for her career. I was initially hesitant, but after discussing and compromising, we made the move and it ended up being one of the best decisions for our family. Being a good husband is not a one-size-fits-all, it’s a continuous effort and learning process.

    • My spouse joined Bullet Proof Husband about a month ago and it has helped considerably. It feels though, like he is slipping into old habits that he was in prior to joining … like sleeping on the couch again. It almost feels now like he was doing just enough to get me to stay, and now he is slacking. I feel like his progress has to do a lot with my hard work too … which is fine. But I feel like he is getting lazy again. Also, he was never present for me over many (like 32 years of our marriage … which is basically all of it) and has done a lot of damage to my kids because of that. He never really established a healthy bond with them. 😭 They are adults now and need the father that they never had. The only thing he has done for them was provide financially. And now they still all live at home … ages 27, 23 and 22. How can and does or will BPH be able to help him heal those relationships with his kids? I haven’t seen much effort coming forth from him in that area. And it breaks my heart for my kids. Also, aside from praying and doing my part, I don’t know how to get him back on track with BPH again. Was his working the program for a short while just his way of placating me to make me think he’s really changed? Feeling the narcissist in him rising up again. 😭😡😳😫😋😤😢


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