I’ve heard that people love lists, and I know from experience that people generally dislike their boss. It’s really quite sad actually, sad that so many of us are in the unfortunate position of working for a man or woman who is either completely delusional, or simply an asshole. It’s on that note that I present to you my own 10 point list of qualities that probably mean your boss is going nuts, or is simply an asshole. I’ve collected these in my mental notebook over the course of many years managing a warehouse for a man that is, quite simply, bat-shit insane.
- Your boss has no concept of time. Tasks that any sane person would allot weeks to complete are expected to be finished in days.
- Your boss constantly complains about money while living in a multi-million dollar house, driving a Mercedes SL500.
- Your boss spends over $3000/month just on wine.
- Your boss thinks that calling retail customers who ordered through the company website will generate additional sales.
- Your boss uses terms like “work the Google more” when planning marketing strategies.
- Your boss uses magic numbers. If you find 10 customers, and they each spend $500, and they tell 10 of their friends…
- Your boss hires only those willing to work for the least amount of money, even if they are grossly unsuited to the job.
- Your boss asks you to do something, and then gets angry when you do it.
- Your boss gets angry when you get sick or have a doctors appointment
- Your boss thinks that everything is a conspiracy, including microwave ovens.
This concludes my list, but like most of you, I could probably add another 90 points. If there are any qualities that I’ve missed, leave me a comment and together we can create the uber boss list.