So a guy who you met last night promised you the moon and so you went to have sex with him. The next day, not a strand of his hair or the scent of his armpit remains. Boohoo. That isn’t something you cry about you know. Or is it that you’re crying because you just realized how unfathomably clueless you are about 21st century dating?
Personally, I don’t even like to use the word “dating” when talking about these sorts of social arrangements. I guess the term hook-up is more appropriate because he literally just “hooks” his thing into your thing and the next thing you know, he’s up and leaving. I’m not really putting the dating scene of today into a bad light. I mean, everyone is entitled to make their own choices and we are allowed to mess with our bodies however way we want. Check this out: https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2013/aug/21/hookup-culture-cultural-phenomenon-casual-sex.
However, I just hope that when you get into this, into this thing called “fling dating,” you already know what you’re getting yourself into. You already know that it’s stupid to cry the next day just because you’ve been left naked on your bed, all alone, and probably with a piece of bread missing from your refrigerator.
That’s how fling dating goes. He woos, he plays, he fucks, and then he leaves. If you’re trying to add pizazz into all of that by being all wishy-washy and romantic, you’re definitely not going to survive in this side of the world.
What’s Fling Dating Anyway?
Trust me; fling dating is hardly anything new. I think people have been doing for ages. The only difference now is that people seem to be more accepting of this behaviour. Plus, you can now find flings online. Back then, you have to reserve your chastity for that one true love of your life. Now, people are getting pregnant at the age of twelve with absolutely no idea who the father is. That’s just how it is; times have surely changed. So instead of clinging on to your own principles, you have to learn and understand the inner workings of this new world. Otherwise, you’d get left behind and your heart will get crushed each and every time.
Fling dating is when you meet with someone and, of course, expecting the possibility of sex during your meeting with little to no expectations of any romantic affiliation. In other words, you’ll just be fulfilling each other’s need to relieve sexual tension which may have built up because of the absence of a real partner. What I’m trying to say is that in fling dating, you engage in couple-like activities without expecting further affiliation with that person in the future. As a rule of thumb, you cannot “kiss and tell” or “sex and tell” in this case.
Now, let’s try to decide whether fling dating is for you or not.
Should You Be Fling Dating?
If you’re the type who’s hopelessly romantic, then I strongly advise you to stay away from this world. The world of casual sex can be terribly overbearing for someone who, consciously or unconsciously, longs for a real connection. Take time to read these rules, for instance. It could be that you’ve had a bad breakup and so you want to prove to yourself that you don’t care about love anymore but in fact, you still do. Your friends know it, your workmates know it, and you probably are aware of it yourself but still you try to leave out the bad thoughts. You want to be free, wild, unbound by your own rules. And so, you think you’re ready to take up fling dating.
If you still have expectations, no matter how small, you will most likely get hurt in the end. So in short, stay away – or at least, don’t get in too deep.
On the other hand, if all you really want to do is enjoy life and get yourself out there, try a bunch of people maybe, then go ahead. There is literally no one stopping you. Fling dating has its risks but if you are 100% aware of what you’re getting yourself into and have no intention whatsoever of taking things seriously (which will actually be problematic on your date’s side), then this is a fun world to experience.