What to do When You Want Life to Get a Little Hairy

When you were younger you probably couldn’t wait to grow a beard, thinking it would be fun and easy. Now that you’re older, we think you’re ready for the truth. Like much of adulthood, beard growing and maintenance looks way more fun than it is. A beard can look great, however, and be easier to maintain if you have the right grooming equipment. If you’ve decided to take the plunge, here are the steps to an awesome beard.

First, make sure you can really grow one. No one is doubting your manliness here, just acknowledging the fact that some guys really can’t grow a full beard. No matter what they try, their chin always looks like a splotchy Chia pet, sprouting hair in some areas and leaving bald spots in others. It takes a solid month for a man who hasn’t tried a beard before to really see what he is working with, so give it some time and see what you’ve got. There are some ways to help make it thicker as you go, so you may want to try them.

During this experimental period, regular shampooing and conditioning for your beard will help keep it from getting itchy, as will facial moisturizer. Invest in shampoos and moisturizers designed for men so you don’t smell like your wife when watching the game with the guys. The right products will eliminate the itch without robbing you of your manhood. Comb or brush your beard during the first few weeks as well, as getting all of the hairs going in the same direction will also reduce itch and improve your beard’s appearance.

Once you know what you can grow, go to a barber and ask him to show you the best way to shape your new facial hair. He can determine the best beard style for your face and then teach you what you need to know to keep your beard perfectly trimmed and looking its best. He might even let you bring in your own grooming tools so you can learn what to do with the same implements you’ll be using at home.

Be sure to include feathering razor blades in your beard care arsenal. A beard should extend down under your chin and slowly taper off as it approaches your Adam’s apple. Never make the common mistake of creating a straight, sharp edge under your chin where your beard ends. This is unnatural and hard to do, so you’ll make yourself crazy trying to get it to look right and still look wrong. Be sure to keep your nose hairs trimmed along with your beard. This will minimize the travel between, umm, let’s say “gross things” in your nose and your face. You can thank me later. It also ensures that your facial hair looks intentional rather than the result of neglected manscaping on your face.