Have you ever gone shopping, only to have your freakishly large dildo pop right out of your backpack in public? Have you ever thought to yourself, if only there was a better way to discretely bring a vibrating rubber baseball bat to the beach?
This problem has plagued billions of Americans just like you, until now. Today I’m pleased to present Teddy Love, a large stuffed animal with a vibrating mouth!
It’s large, it’s furry, it’s got a long vibrating tongue, and you can bring it absolutely anywhere with you, because there’s absolutely nothing strange about carrying around a stuffed animal as a grown adult. In fact, I used to see a mini-skirt wearing grandmother do this all the time! Whether you’re at work or play, Teddy Love will blend in perfectly with your already expansive collection of stuffed animals.
Teddy Love in Indie Go Go
As a mature adult man or woman, there’s nothing we want more than a giant glassy eyed teddy bear to vibrate our genitals. Thankfully this New Jersey – as in, the place in the United States – company has taken the initiative and started the wheels turning to bring this much needed product to market.
When I first saw this listed, I thought to myself, man… I wonder if the manufacturer is Disney certified? Thankfully, my fears were completely unfounded. It looks like Teddy’s manufacturing is in good hands. He’ll be in even better hands afterwards, am I right???
Yes, I believe Teddy Love is destined for great things. Just like the iPhone that kicked off a mobile device revolution, we’ll undoubtedly see Teddy Love in billions of homes by the end of the year. As of this writing, the Teddy Love team has already raised almost $700 of their initial $50,000 goal. Do the right thing and help bring discrete pleasure to the masses.
Would using this constitute anthropomorphic bestiality?
You know… that’s a good question.