You need people. That’s a fact. Developing your people skills is probably one of the wisest investments you could ever make for yourself. Brilliant people who have already developed their people skills are already on their way to the top. Others who have also realized the importance of improving people skills have built their businesses on helping individuals improve the way they relate to other people.
Examine the way you relate to people. How good are you when it comes to working with people? Do you listen carefully to others or do you do most of the talking? Do you expect people to follow your command or do you create a win-win situation for parties concerned?
Improving your people skills starts with the right understanding of people. One of the keys to understanding human nature is frequent interaction with people. This will certainly be a big boost in establishing great relationships with your boss, officemates, spouse, children, friends, relatives, etc. These people can lift you up in victory, or these same people can refuse to do so.
Why do people refuse to extend assistance?
Two of the major reasons why people refuse to extend support or assistance are the perceived fear of losing and the absence of gain. Part of understanding human nature is to realize that most people always look after their own welfare first before the welfare of others.
The fear of losing prevents people from extending assistance most especially if it involves money, confidence, health, time, energy, and security (not necessarily in that order!). The trick then is to frame your request in order to minimize the fear of losing and emphasize the gains. Highlight the idea of winning and give assurance that losing is remote.
After you succeed in taking off the fear of losing, the next thing you need to do is to show the benefit they will gain from your offer. Among people, the fear of losing is paramount over the benefit of gaining. With this in mind, the gains should be equal or greater than the perceived fear of loss.
Another important factor in developing people skills is to have a good reputation. In establishing good relations, people look at the reputation of the person making the offer.
Reputation is built on first impressions, and first impressions last. With this, it is extremely important that you establish good impressions right at the very onset of the meeting. With a good reputation, succeeding requests will sail through. It is easier to make a first good impression than correct a previous bad one.
The bottom line is this: In order to succeed in life, you have to develop your people skills. Part of this is understanding human nature and how people relate with each other. You also have to practice interacting with a variety of personalities. Improve your people skills and increase your odds for success!
