I Recently spent two weeks in Europe traveling from place to place with no razor, and not enough good sense to realize that I was starting to resemble a drunken homeless person. After a few choice comments about my fine-looking beard, I decided to do something about it. I did what many would consider insane, and allowed another person to hold an unbelievably sharp blade near and against my face. Yes folks, I got a shave the old-fashioned way, with a straight razor.
If you’ve ever dreamed of getting a shave that’s far closer than any electric or disposable razor can provide, or you simply want to experience the thrill of having another man stretch your skin taught while raking a blade across your face in a manly fashion, then consider getting a shave from a trained professional. I’ve wanted to get a straight razor shave for years, but after having seen a friend buy his own, shave with it, and fail in a spectacle of bloody-faced glory, well… I opted to let someone else do it for me.
What you can expect from your first straight razor shave…
- Stretching… so much stretching. Given the comically sharp nature of the straight razor, your shaver will stretch your skin taught as he/she works to make sure that they don’t accidentally remove parts of your face. It’s a bit uncomfortable, but go with it, lest you look like someone out of a Picasso painting.
- You may feel like someone is dragging sand paper across your skin. I didn’t find this particularly uncomfortable, but it was a little strange. The reason for this is that the blade is so sharp that it removes a bit of skin as well. It’s almost like you’re getting a facial scrub at the same time, amazing!
- If anyone is watching you, they’re probably laughing and making fun of the hilarious facial expressions you’re making. I can’t speak for everyone, but my face contorted into various freakish expressions, partly out of terror, and partly because the guy was tugging my face around like a Stretch Armstrong doll.
- Burning, so much burning. After the person finishes shaving your face, they’ll slap on some after shave. I generally shave with an electric razor and had never tried an after shave before, so the moment of eye-watering burning was a bit startling.
- Once the barber finishes, you’ll notice that your face is as smooth as a baby’s bottom. In the hands of a skilled operator, straight razors make for an incredibly close shave. If you’ve gone to an idiot, though, perhaps you lost your nose.