Meeting Your Online Crush Offline

So, you’ve put the time and effort into making the most appealing profile for each of the apps you use. You’re looking for something serious at this point, so the effort was well worth it as you got more matches after you put some time and energy into your profile. You finally met someone with whom you felt an initial spark, and the sparkled to a genuine connection. 

Chances are you’ve been chatting with this person for several weeks via text message and phone calls at this point, maybe even Facetiming or meeting up on Zoom. You find yourself in the exciting situation of getting ready to meet your online crush offline for the first time. But, just as you had to put some time and effort into your profile to meet your match – you need to put in even more effort to make sure the first date goes swimmingly! After all, dating in society is getting more challenging and complex, so if there’s an in-person connection like during messaging, you want this to last. Let’s take a look at some ways to make sure this first impression is a lasting one. 

Get Grooming Before You Get Going 

There indeed are plenty of fish in the sea, as they say, and although physical appearances aren’t what makes a relationship last, they do play into your first impression. Hopefully, you’ve represented yourself accurately online and through selfies to your crush, but those are carefully curated out of a series of photographs you may have taken of yourself. So, make sure you take time to groom yourself to look your best. If you need a haircut and or a beard trim, see your barber. Don’t forget any nose or ear hairs either! Take time to make sure you’re smelling fantastic in your Mambo cologne and dressed to the nines. You want to dress appropriately for the date you’ve planned but look sharp for the occasion. 

Picking The Perfect Date 

Speaking of the date you’ve planned, you want to put some thought into the date. Maybe your crush was the one that initiated the plan, and both parties appreciate some thought going into any date, but especially the first one. Ideally, your first meetup will be something planned to be short in case there are no sparks in real life – like a drink, coffee, or walk. That way, either person can dip out if things don’t click, but you have the opportunity to continue the date if it’s going well. No matter what the two of you are doing, make sure you plan ahead and even surprise them with a token like flowers, a bottle of wine, anything you think they’d enjoy based on what you know about them so far. These minor thoughtful additions will make you stand out from any other suitors they may be chatting with too.

Communicate Effectively And Listen Too 

So often, dates seem sour because one person does all the talking, and the other may feel overwhelmed. This is generally the result of the “talker” being nervous. If you’re feeling anxious, take deep breaths (or a shot) to calm your nerves and try not to let your social anxiety overtake you. Don’t feel the need to fill in any silences with oversharing. Additionally, there is nothing more attractive than someone that we think is genuinely listening to us. So, if your date is sharing stories or details about their life, show them you appreciate them letting you in by being a trustworthy listener. Try turning off the machine in your head, just waiting to interject your opinion or story and listen to them. This will go a long way and will make you stand out from other men who may be too aggressive. 

Keep Things Simple and Sweet

One mistake a lot of men make is trying to rush things on the first date. While there’s nothing wrong with letting the night take you where it may go, there’s also something to be said for having patience. It’s not about playing games and trying to keep the other person guessing, but if you play your entire hand on the first date, you may not leave much mystery to keep you on their mind. So, don’t be afraid to cut the date off at an organic stopping point – make sure you set up plans for a second date if it’s going well, so they know you’re still interested. 

Meeting offline for the first time can seem daunting or overwhelming, but it really shouldn’t be. The reality is that most couples meet online these days, so you may already be versed in first dates outside of virtual ones. Practice makes perfect, but there are always some nerves involved when you’re invested in an online crush and can see a future there. Use the tips mentioned above to nail the first date, and hopefully, it’s the first of many more to come!




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I'm the resident dating expert here. I love women, believe me. Maybe a little too much, but I give great advice. Just try me.

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