There’s almost nothing I like less than seeing cutesy cat and dog photos online. That’s actually one of the reasons I decided to finally delete my Facebook account. The deluge of animal and baby photos (I guess that’s actually redundant) were staggering, and of course, nauseating. So with that in mind, it may surprise you to see me posting these fine specimens.
They’re called Warp Dogs, and as you’ll see in a moment, their abilities are out of this world. After having conquered Klaxon XI and the entirety of the Rhim Jhob Nebula, they decided to set their sights on another planet… Earth.
Warp Dogs, Set a Course for Earth
Let me take a brief pause from my creepy dog fan fiction to explain why I like these. I can actually explain it thusly; they aren’t just stock, boring, run of the mill photos of dogs laying on couches, or smiling, or playing with terrible, monster children. The fellow who created these (I’ll get to him in a bit), lovingly crafted these to resemble a scene out of Star Trek, and that my friends is why these are superior to Caturday in every way.
I mean, obviously they aren’t as good as these baby photos I created, but they’re definitely a close second.
In case you’re wondering, yes… these dogs have evolved to breath dark matter. They don’t have to worry about something so trivial as oxygen.
You know, this kind of looks like it was taken in a photo booth. Is that even legal? I’m pretty sure there’s a law against animals in photo booths, or in fact, people even using photos booths anymore.
Dogmeat the dog, narrowly escaping the portal before it closed, never to open again.
Sweet Zombie Jesus, how fast was this person driving their car? Er… I mean, space ship! They must have been going at least warp 9 here, maybe even faster.
Will the Warp Dogs finally make it to earth, or will they forever be caught in a cycle of lolling tongue joy rides across the universe? Stay tuned on the official home of the Warp Dogs for more photos as The Frogman so graciously releases them for our entertainment.
