Does Justin Bieber terrify you beyond all reason? If he doesn’t…why not?! If you’re having a hard time hating him even after the numerous callous displays of his monkey-abandoning, leopard-print-car-having, leather-sweatpants-wearing ways, then I have just the Tumblr to scare some goddamn sense into you. It’s called JustinGiger, and it is amazing. And terrifying. And hilarious. It will cultivate a proper appreciation for the terrors that lurk in the minds of men and the strength of our inexplicable attraction to people who have no business benefiting from it. But mostly, it will have you worried that Justin Giger Aliens come at night. Mostly.
Justin Giger Aliens: Proof That Whoever Seeded Our Planet Was a Malicious Asshole
H.R. Giger’s work has always been close to my heart. Despite being
a delicate ladylike creature with womanly sensibilities terrified of aliens, I’ve always loved the bizarre blend of organic and metallic that comprises his carefully constructed, hypnotically patterned art. The Alien movies (while providing me with years of an ingrown fear that otherworldly visitors are lurking in wait to rip out my spleen) have always been a favorite of mine, and of Chad as well. This year for Christmas, I sent him a plush, stuffed animal chestburster in a ripped up bloody t shirt. Had I known about this magical Tumblr earlier, I would have absolutely put a little Justin Bieber mask on it. PRESENTATION IS EVERYTHING.
Justin Giger Aliens are just the tip of the iceberg; the full range of Giger’s works are represented in this masterful collection. A part of me wants to try to contact him and ask if he’s actually the genius behind these brilliant pictures, but unlike nuking things from orbit, there’s just no way to be sure. Enjoy the horror and the mystery, and don’t spend too much time thinking about it. Otherwise, you might start feeling a weird itching in your chest and suddenly you’ll have spent four days crouched under a table in fetal position praying that no little FaceBiebers are incubating inside you right now.
Follow this growing collection of Justin Giger Aliens at justingiger.tumblr.com. Despite my deepest wishes that 73 year old Giger is sitting at home scanning teen people for photoshop fodder, JustinGiger is actually created by Hudson Hongo, so go give him props to encourage more of this madness. And if any of you want to print me out a life size poster to adorn the dark, murky halls of my bunker, I’ll simultaneously love you and curse your name forever.
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