In practically every town, city, and country, folks are allowing technology to intrude upon their relationships, even their sex lives. But in the real world, our digital obsession is harming our love lives.
Our Obsession With Device Technologies
It seems apparent that growing numbers of people are having deeper relationships with their smartphones and social platforms than their partners.
There’s a locally based free dating website called Free Dating Australia where I am a part-time moderator in their live chat room, and I can tell you that sometimes it gives me hours of entertainment watching the back-and-forth banter as complete strangers divulge rather sensitive information within this public chat room environment.
As an example of how free dating sites and dating apps are affecting relationships, I recall a recent conversation in the chat room where a young lady who goes by the name of Tess, who married just 6 months ago, was complaining that her new husband always has his iPhone within arms reach, and even answers it during sex. The fact that newly married Tess felt the need to go to a singles chat room to vent her disappointment is as equally disturbing as her husband’s iPhone obsession.
Technology and sex
Who could have ever imagined we’d be talking about sex technologies – what on earth does that even mean? I hear my mother gasp! Fortunately for our parents and grandparents, sex technologies are something they never had to deal with. Technology and sex have become entwined in many ways, none more so than online dating. In my line of work, it’s critical to understand what my customers are asking for and telling me, and if I don’t adapt, I’ll be obsolete in no time.
Times have changed; the internet allows even the most reserved individuals to shrug off their inhibitions without the fear of any long-lasting recourse if things don’t quite go to plan; you know what I mean, right? – plenty more fish in the sea, swipe left for no, right for yes – a broken heart can be mended quick-smart these days with new faces and opportunities to meet new people is a given, and the anonymity of sophisticated dating apps means it saves us from the embarrassment of rejection.
Balancing social platforms and your relationship
According to a publication on Science Direct, increased usage of Facebook has been directly correlated to the rise in divorce rates. It might be considered that a Facebook profile, even though a small factor when compared against various other drivers of human behavior, has a significant statistical impact on separations, even divorce.
If you love your partner and you live in fear that technologies are getting in the way, there are concrete steps you can take to protect your relationship from the effects of social platforms. Let’s face it, revealing too many private details can certainly have its downfalls and potentially lead to deceit. Some of the most robust monogamous relationships have become victims to the growing statistics that lead to breaking up thanks to the internet.
On the other hand, there are couples who swear by social media as a means of staying connected when apart. So if you’re a busy, time-poor professional, you can keep up to speed on each other’s movements simply by following each other on Twitter and sending messages to cheer each other up.
If you and your partner are both active users on internet social platforms, sit down together and discuss what is and what is not appropriate when engaging your social pages. Set up a few rules, like sticking to certain hours so there’s a cut-off time for posting things each day. Also, make a policy not to overshare. Before you post something, ask yourself if it’s truly appropriate to be sharing with someone other than your partner.
With any new relationship, or if you’re in the interim stages of dating, avoid connecting on social media for a while, as it’s a sure way to build distrust or jump to conclusions. Before connecting socially, the ground rules for either casual dating or a committed relationship should first be established. Becoming friends on Facebook too early will usually result in hurt feelings if you see pictures of him hugging another woman, even though the woman might well be his sister or cousin.
If you’re a single guy or girl and have romance on your mind, dating apps are killing romance. Dating apps that are designed to foster romantic unions are few and far between, so if you have romance in mind, try sticking to one of the traditional free dating sites that are designed to match people based on compatibility rather than looking for love in the wrong places.
